


E-mails to Antartica

by misura



Category: Hellboy (Movies)
Genre: Community: hellishness, Epistolary, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-01-30
Updated: 2011-01-30
Packaged: 2017-10-15 06:04:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/157765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/misura/pseuds/misura
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Don't tell me you don't like penguins.</p>
            </blockquote>





	E-mails to Antartica

_From: big_red@gmail.com_  
To: john.myers@bprd.gov  
Subject: hey you 

Yo, Myers.

Hope you're having a great time. I hear there's all kinds of cool shit over there like snow and uh more snow and oh, hey, penguins. Don't tell me you don't like penguins.

Anyways, mail me back some time. Or not. Whatever.

 

_From: big_red@gmail.com_  
To: john.myers@bprd.gov  
Subject: hey you, over there 

Yo, Myers.

So I guess you're maybe still kind of pissed, huh?

You're hurting my feelings, really you are. I mean, do you know how many people would like to be where you are? All that snow and uh more snow and penguins. Penguins are nice, right? I'd trade places with you in a heartbeat, cross my heart and hope to die.

... Juuust kidding.

About you hurting my feelings, I mean. We're cool, right? 'course we are.

 

_From: big_red@gmail.com_  
To: john.myers@bprd.gov  
Subject: I'm talking to you 

Yo, Myers.

What's with the silent treatment, huh? Huh? What, you're not going to talk to me just because you're pissed, is that it? What are you, a five-year-old girl?

Get over it already. You could be on the northpole right now, you know. They haven't got any penguins over there, did you know that? I looked it up on the internet. You know, that thing you can also use for stuff like sending e-mails.

 

_From: big_red@gmail.com_  
To: john.myers@bprd.gov  
Subject: stop ignoring me 

Yo, Myers.

Talk to me already.

 

_From: big_red@gmail.com_  
To: john.myers@bprd.gov  
Subject: fine, I don't like you anymore either 

Yo, Myers.

Know what? I don't care. You can do whatever you want.

Abe's okay, thanks for asking. (I mean that ironically.) Me and Liz? Couldn't be better. Honestly.

Got any funny videos with penguins? I bet you do. How 'bout sharing? It's what nice guys like you are supposed to do.

 

_From: big_red@gmail.com_  
To: john.myers@bprd.gov  
Subject: I am getting really tired of this 

Yo, Myers.

Another pretty normal week at work over here. Bet things are lots more exciting over there, with the snow and the penguins and all that shit. Lucky you.

Saved the world, almost got myself killed - the usual.

Liz is pregnant.

 

_From: big_red@gmail.com_  
To: john.myers@bprd.gov  
Subject: PS 

Yo, Myers.

Forgot to tell you last time: I quit the Bureau.

How's digs over there? Aside from the penguins, I mean. Think there's some nice, quiet place to, you know, raise a family, that sort of thing?

And oh, you can babysit, right? Nice guy like you - bet all the kids just love you.


End file.
